Showing posts from February, 2013

Survivor's Edge

As you can tell in my last post I still have my survivor's edge going.  I have to remind myself sometimes I am not in the midst of a huge battle anymore.  Its kinda like post war times right now.  The recovery effort is still in full effect but the war is won.  I need some basic low level Bartonella bacteria killers like Abart which is basically a bunch of herbs in a liquid that put drops of in a cup of water.  In the homeopathic world its called a tincture.  I call it the Bart Killer. LOL.  I need to go back on this treatment and make sure this last strain of bacteria is gone but other than that I took a hula hooping class for the fun of it.  I have a few small bruises to prove it!  It was a blast.  And I am looking into taking belly dancing classes which I would of never done in a million years.  My coordination with Lyme and friends was non existent.  So now I can think straight and not trip over my feet I decided to try something new that's out of the box and a little sex…


Its revolutionary to see myself complete in my incompleteness.  It stops the whole idea of needing something to make myself complete all the time.  I thought I had stopped this compulsion to find wholeness through people, money, things, religion, better health.  It is revolutionary to simply love yourself instead and enjoy the life you've been given.  To reach out for your dreams and run after them.  Its stops the loops of self hatred hard in its tracks.  I've been married now for almost 10 years and as I look back at our evolution I realize that as I change, we change.  I never really had a father super involved in my life.  He was there but his heart was tangled up in pain.  I am still not sure what that is for him.  So when I got married I had a whole in my heart that I thought my husband could fill.  And yes we argued a lot.  On top of all this under current, I had undiagnosed Lyme Disease and eventually on top of that I had a young son who was super energetic.  A few yea…