What do I say now?


I've  been in Lyme disease treatment now going on six years.  I am using my skills for good and I'm an advocate.  But what else is there?  I am reminded of a time when my acupuncturist told me if you could spend all your energy on getting well and put it into something else what would you do?  I am still trying to answer his question.  I enjoy helping out other learning patients.  I help out with a lime disease support group.  I am trying to use my photography to get the word out about Lyme disease but again what else is out there for me?  I homeschool my son.  I clean my house.  I've really enjoyed going to the ocean a lot this summer.  Despite some of my down days and not feeling well I've been able to keep up with my friends.  But again I ask myself what else is out there for me.  I think soul-searching is normal.  And I know it 36 there must be other opportunities that I can take a hold of but again what do I want?  I know creativity is a big part of who I am.  On my good days I start to explore what that means to me.  I think what I am needing is new experiences that have never had before I've always been a constant learner.  I know Lyme disease will be there in the back room somewhere no matter what I do but I don't want it to define all of me.  It's time for me to open up the doors and walk through them.  Instead of staring at the door handle.  I need new fun memories filled with all that I love my family my son my cats photography art music.  I want a life that spills over into the lives of others in a positive way.  It's time for me to discover how to do that.  Now is the time to move forward no matter what lyme disease does in my life.  I can keep waiting for the other shoe to drop or I can just focus on living to the fullest the best I can.  


 

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