Finding Hope

Every time I have a bad day with Lyme I start to wonder will I ever get better? Will I ever be the same again? Ever since I started the Lyme Loft I try to take time and read peoples personal stories and I as I chat with people I again have to say, will any of us ever get better? When will it end? Is there any "hope"? The song that I have listened to about a million times is the Chris Tomlin song "I will rise" which is posted on our main page. Its my favorite lately because I feel like my "flesh" fails everyday. Trying to keep up with a three year old boy, house, family, etc. is overwhelming sometimes. I start to wonder can I do all this? My answer to myself is usually NO! But the more I read and the more I hear what all of you have to say and the more I listen to this song I find the energy to keep moving forward. Not because of pity but because I see that we all have "BAD" days, weeks, months, years! Somehow we find a way to talk to one another, live, and find specks of hope to hold onto. I think my hope now lies not in what I cannot do because that list sometimes seems really long. My hope is in realizing that this body of pain is not permanent, my ears works most of the time and I can listen to my friends and family, and I have a voice that works to educate others around me about Chronic Lyme Disease. So "I will rise on eagles wings"(from the Chris Tomlin song) not because of my own strength but because I think God has already given me all I need to do my best. A heart that is open and willing to give some comfort when I can, ears that hear other hurt and eyes that see the pain around me. I don't need a perfect body to do what I've been made for, to be an Angel to others. Proverbs says that a man without vision dies. And honestly I think Solomon was right. I understand my calling now. Knowing that gives me a dream and Lyme cannot take away my dreams. I HOPE that as times goes on and we get to know one another that we will take time to listen to one another's heartbreak, give support as much as we can, and realize that together we can get through this. Because there is no way I can do this alone. Instead lets just get through the everyday together. It makes it more bearable that way :) This is the place I come to, to realize I am not alone and I am not the only one. And I hope that this can be the same story for all of us. (((((((HUGS))))))) Angele


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